Forgive & Forget

"I want to forgive you; and I want to forget you."

If you are any kind of reality TV fan you know this line very well, and maybe have even used it a time or two. I myself may have used it once, but it was an extremely mature situation which rendered an extremely mature comment such as this, therefore giving me justification in using it... right?

I hate it when people apologize and ask forgiveness from me. I'm not exactly sure why but something inside me wants them to feel better about the situation and therefore my usual responds is "oh, it's ok; no big deal." On the flip side though if it's really not ok with me the phrase "It's fine!" usually pops out of my mouth with every bit of attitude I can muster as I cross my arms and glare in an attempt to make it as obvious as possible that it in fact is not fine and no, I do not want to get over it and move on. At which point the words "I want to forgive you; and I want to forget you" once rolled off my lips. Yes, at that moment I was officially dubbed the coolest girl in town (don't hate).

All too often this is the mentality of our society. We want to say that we forgive someone but then write them off like a bad check; or continue to hold it over their heads in an attempt to make ourselves feel better by making them feel worse. But no where in scripture do we find this obscure sense of reality ok. In fact, we find the opposite.

Jesus, after being beaten and broken to the point of unrecognition and hung naked on the cross, cried out to God "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do." We, as Christians, are called to be Christ-like, therefore we should daily, hourly, even every minute of every day, ask ourselves; "What did Jesus do?" If Jesus loved, we are to love; if Jesus evangelized, we are to evangelize; if Jesus forgave, we too are to forgive "not seven times, but seventy-seven times."

He told me he was sorry; and through my tears of pain and frustration I remembered to ask myself "What did Jesus do?" I remembered that He first forgave me and He first forgot, not me, but my sin. Through my tears I spoke those three little words that have such power; "I forgive you." And I really meant it; for the first time I meant that I was forgiving and forgetting, not the way the world does, but the way Jesus did.

Conviction is only the first step...

We sat there, eating our sandwiches and discussing the lessons of life as well as what the infallible Word of God says regarding said topics. She spoke of her convictions and I, being the great christian woman that I am*, simply stated that "conviction is only the first step, it's what you do about that conviction that really matters." I spoke those words and as they left my mouth I was convicted; I knew what I had to do...

I had been going back and forth with God all day on how to handle a certain situation that I had gotten myself into. He knew that I knew what I needed to do; but I continued to ask questions and He continued to answer until He got tired of me. He finally told me that I knew what I needed to do and He wasn't going to talk about it anymore. This pathetic back and forth discussion made me realize the extent of God's grace for His people. I'm sure I'm making Him blue in the face at times but amazingly, He loves me anyways; no matter how stubborn or immature I may be. Little did I know that the depth of my knowledge of His grace was about to increase. James 4:6 says But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."
I returned from lunch knowing that I needed to swollow my pride, no matter how much it hurt. And oh did it hurt. So, with tears and humility, I confessed my mistake, repented, and asked for forgiveness. I had no idea how he would respond and frankly, expected the worst. Luckily, this certain person is not the type to inflict "the worst"; he graciously forgave and I felt completely unworthy. I had hurt him in many ways but he was so quick to forgive and forget, I was amazed.

How often do we hurt God? Yet God is quick to forgive and forget, not matter how large or small our transgression is against Him. All we must do is repent; confess that we messed up and decide to learn from our mistake. Proverbs 28:13 states He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoeve confesses and renounces them finds mercy. And Psalms 103:12 says as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Sometimes God has to bring us down in order to pick us back up again, to remind us that we are sinful man and He is the one and only perfect God; slow to anger and abounding in love (Psalms 103:9)

Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. C. S. Lewis

*I say this in complete sarcasm, knowing that I am no where near perfect; no matter how much I like to think I am at times.