I'm back!

"After L.I.T. is over" I told myself over and over again. After L.I.T. is over I will start on my stacks of books that are accumulating through out my room; after L.I.T. is over I will quickly get rid of the 15 extra pounds I so happily put on during the holidays; after L.I.T. is over I will start blogging again. Well, dear internet, here we are, 2 months later, and I have yet to finish one book, shed any number of pounds without putting it right back on again, and post any sort of writings to my blog- epic fail (that's right, I used the word epic).

I had plans for all the moments I would blog about, all the highlights that I had experienced but lacked time to write out, and while those plans seem unrealistic now considering that every new day brings a new thought and idea to blog, I thought I would try to hit the high points, to, if nothing else, at least amuse my self.... and then I realized that would take much longer than I had time for. So, for now, I leave you with a photo from our L.I.T. grad party:)

You better put on your stretchy pants

"You wanna preach the last 5 minutes of the message and close us up tonight?" Wait, what? Is he serious right now? He can't be serious right now. He just learn of my desire to preach a few moments ago. But, to be fair, he did warn me to be ready at any time.... I just figured he would give more time to be ready at any time. STILL, I'm not prepared, I don't have a nicely typed outline with bullet points, underlined words and scripture references to accompany. Pretty sure all of these thoughts went through my head, simultaneously, in less than a nano second... and before I knew it I said "yes." WHAT!! I just said yes, oh Jesus help me. And that right there was all I needed- Jesus.

Many times we look at something, such as preaching, and immediately look at ourselves, our flaws, fear of man and what others might think of us, not even giving the thought a chance. We look to ourselves, thinking we are unworthy, and loose focus of who it's really all about- Jesus. Who are we to tell Him what to do, or not do? who is worthy of such a task and who isn't? When did we loose sight that it isn't about us?

Paul exhorted the Romans and Christians everywhere in Romans 12 to "in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God" God has a plan and a purpose for every single person - every-single-person- and all He asks of us is to give our selves to him "offer our bodies as livings sacrifices". And when this is done something amazing happens, He begins to use you and His plan and destiny for your life begins to unfold right in front of you. Before you know it your preaching the closing message to your brothers and sisters in Christ on a Sunday night service.

I encourage you, simply offer yourself to God. See what happens. I guarantee you, He will use you. He is desiring to use you right now! It may be uncomfortable and you may be stretched to a new level (that's what stretchy pants are for though, right?) but being stretched and uncomfortable is a good thing, you begin to realize that you can't do it on your own and that you must rely on God. "For all things are possible with God." Matthew 19:26

Conviction is only the first step...

We sat there, eating our sandwiches and discussing the lessons of life as well as what the infallible Word of God says regarding said topics. She spoke of her convictions and I, being the great christian woman that I am*, simply stated that "conviction is only the first step, it's what you do about that conviction that really matters." I spoke those words and as they left my mouth I was convicted; I knew what I had to do...

I had been going back and forth with God all day on how to handle a certain situation that I had gotten myself into. He knew that I knew what I needed to do; but I continued to ask questions and He continued to answer until He got tired of me. He finally told me that I knew what I needed to do and He wasn't going to talk about it anymore. This pathetic back and forth discussion made me realize the extent of God's grace for His people. I'm sure I'm making Him blue in the face at times but amazingly, He loves me anyways; no matter how stubborn or immature I may be. Little did I know that the depth of my knowledge of His grace was about to increase. James 4:6 says But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."
I returned from lunch knowing that I needed to swollow my pride, no matter how much it hurt. And oh did it hurt. So, with tears and humility, I confessed my mistake, repented, and asked for forgiveness. I had no idea how he would respond and frankly, expected the worst. Luckily, this certain person is not the type to inflict "the worst"; he graciously forgave and I felt completely unworthy. I had hurt him in many ways but he was so quick to forgive and forget, I was amazed.

How often do we hurt God? Yet God is quick to forgive and forget, not matter how large or small our transgression is against Him. All we must do is repent; confess that we messed up and decide to learn from our mistake. Proverbs 28:13 states He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoeve confesses and renounces them finds mercy. And Psalms 103:12 says as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

Sometimes God has to bring us down in order to pick us back up again, to remind us that we are sinful man and He is the one and only perfect God; slow to anger and abounding in love (Psalms 103:9)

Experience: that most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn. C. S. Lewis

*I say this in complete sarcasm, knowing that I am no where near perfect; no matter how much I like to think I am at times.

The man on a bike

I was driving home from church Saturday night and began to complain. I know, I know, I'm a horrible person but it was cold and rainy, and I DO NOT like being cold; being wet and cold is a double negative in my book! So there I was, driving in my comfy car, that has been oh so faithful to get me where I'm going, with a roof that has only leaked on my once (ok, actually it poured water on my head but we're not going there), complaining to God, pleading with Him to just make my car warm up a little bit faster. And then a pass a man on a bike. Yes internet, he was biking in the cold rain while I was complaining to God because my car wasn't warm! Paaaathetic. Im pretty sure God was sitting up in heaven saying "Seriously, Justine." Talk about a reality check for me. God has blessed me with so many comforts in life, and I still had the nerve to complain.

Today I'm thankful for the little things that God has blessed me with; a fully functional car, a pillow to rest my head on at night, a roof over my head, shoes on my feet, and a wonderful family that blesses me daily

My new found love...

Two weeks ago I had the opportunity of a lifetime to learn from an amazing photographer, and friend, Holli True. I can't say enough about how much I absolutely adore Holli and the amazing friend she has been and is to me. And to have the chance to learn from her was unbelievable. I truly felt honored.

We were able to round up a threesome of girls who were nothing short of fabulously gorgeous for our shoot and went out in search of some spots. The day was cold but the girls stuck it out and we all had a great time.

Ok, enough talking- here are my very first shots as a photographer! (how exciting!)

To Write Love on Her Arms

Tomorrow is International To Write Love On Her Arms Day (in case you hadn't heard). I am a HUGE supporter of this amazing organization and hope that you become one too. They are amazing people, doing amazing things for other amazing people who just don't know amazing they are yet. Check it out and I think you will share in my support.

We prayed, worshiped, prayed, worshiped and prayed and prayed and prayed.

All night prayer? Like, you pray ALLLL night?! On Halloween?

I had never heard of such a thing until I started this internship; but needless to say I was stoked to experience such an event. We prayed, worshiped, prayed, worshiped, and prayed and prayed and prayed. It was epic, to say the least. The moment that really touched my heart and brought out a few liquid tears was when, towards the beginning of the night, we prayed over the girls that were out and about who were very vulnerable, lost, and looking for some sort of love and approval for someone, somewhere. This really hit home. I used to be one of these girls. I looked to men for the love and approval that would only come from Jesus. We prayed for these girls; for their safety, that they would feel the love that Jesus has for them, realize their self worth, and come running to their Saviour. My heart went out to them. I knew where they were, how they felt, and what they were looking for.

I then began to think about all the prayers that had gone out in years past; prayers for me, my safety, and salvation. When I was lost, vulnerable, and looking for love and approval, some one was praying for me. The amazing thing about my God is that He answers prayers. My parents, my family, my church had not idea how or when God would answer their prayers (just as we have no idea how or when He will answer the prayers we prayed that night) but knew that He would; and He did.

I have days; days where I feel discouraged, days where my heart hurts for my unsaved family and friends. But God always reminds me that all I have to do is ask.

Matthew 7:7-11 says:

7"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
9"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!